I’ve been thinking about writing and writers in reference in connecting with fans or potential fans. I’m finding that some writers are actually afraid to offend their readers. Now, I’m not talking about purposely offending but simply to be who they are as individuals and in the process offend in some way. In other words, to pander to their fans with a facade of who they really are or what they really want to write so they can keep up an image. There’s a word for that.

Cowardice.

There’s another word for that as well.

Disingenuous.

Again, I’m not talking about being brash and obnoxious without some kind of restraint. That’s just being rude and stupid. What I’m speaking of is walking on eggshells in their online interactions. We’re writers so there’s a way to say things with tact as well as pointedness. But what I find sometimes in online exchanges is that some writers are…oh…what’s the word…spineless.

See. There’s an offense. Too bad it’s the truth.

Don’t get me wrong here. I’m not saying we should go out looking for confrontations like cro-magnon man. However, we shouldn’t be afraid to be ourselves because the reality of life is that someone is going to dislike you. It’s just the way that it is. It’s better to accept that reality and be who you are, warts, weakness, and all instead of trying to be all for all. That’s just foolishness. Yes, we should be cordial, discreet (at times), decent, and polite as possible. But it should be real.

If there’s one thing I’d want my three fans to know is that the person that writes on this blog is real deal. This is how I am. I am not a politician. My stripes don’t change when I’m in the room with different people. I am who I am. 

So if I do offend, feel free to call me out on it. I’m a nobody here so I have no shame in admitting when I’m wrong. What I would ask (and I know just the very way I’m writing this sounds offensive but I like living on the edge) is that you’d make sure I’m wrong because I most certainly will tell you if you are.

Good grief. I must love abuse.

2 Thoughts to “Afraid to Offend vs. Dare to Be Honest”

  1. I think you’re right: there’s a fine line between knowing how honest to be but also representing yourself in an honest way. You’d never want to put up a facade and be someone you’re not, but turning people away with a blunt honesty that could have been worded less offensively is also not a desired outcome.

    Presenting your opinions as an opinion is always helpful, I think, because an opinion is what it is. More forgivable than saying, ‘I’m right, you’re wrong’ kind of deal.

    At any rate: you’ll never please everyone!

  2. I think it’s picking your battles and learning to live with that. Obviously, I don’t mind saying things that I think need to be said. It’s choosing when silence is more offensive than truth or honesty.

    I have three fans. Now, I may at one point post something or respond to something that may offend them and that number will go down to two. I run that risk every time I post something. There are some writers, fairly successful, who are rude and obnoxious on a pretty regular basis at their sites. They offend on a pretty regular basis. Do I think that’s wise? Of course not. But one thing I give ’em is they are real deal. And quite frankly, when looking at the core of what they are saying, they’re usually right.

    We live one time. May as well be as who we are.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *